a november rain.

when I say I miss you it don't mean: "wow, I haven't seen you for a long time, I long to see your face again and hug you."


No.

it means I miss the way you used to be. isn't it like they say - near the sparkling past, tomorrow is colorless...? - I miss how you used to talk to me so relentlessly, the way you used to look at me in the darkness, how you longed for my presence and expected me so anxiously...the way we used to just fool 'round town and talk shit all day long, the way we didn't care about stupid relationship stuff, we were just two free young souls running wild (in our own way), bouncing on the dancefloor and screaming at the top of our lungs.

you know how fragile I am, don't you? you know how I need someone, someone like you, to help me go through these changing times, 'cause everybody is changing so much, and I don't know where to turn.

maybe I'm asking too much of you...but well, can't I? guess I never had you whole (and you didn't have me either) so how can I be asking so much of you, things you can't satisfy, you can't give to me. like Dylan said "I gave her my heart, but she wanted my soul..."

I know sometimes you need some time on your own, and that everybody needs some time, but remember:
- nothing lasts forever, even a cold november rain...